Winter’s Class – A story for today

Professor Evelyn Winters was renowned across campus for two things: her brilliant lectures on Russian literature and her elaborate April Fool’s Day pranks. This year, she was determined to outdo herself.

On March 31st, she placed a beautifully painted matryoshka doll on her desk with a note: “A gift from a grateful student. Please do not open until after class.”

The next morning, April 1st, her classroom was packed. Students whispered excitedly, eager to see what prank the professor had planned. Evelyn entered, feigning surprise at the crowd.

“My, what attendance! If only you were this enthusiastic about Dostoyevsky,” she quipped. “I see you’ve noticed my gift. Shall we open it together?”

With theatrical flair, she twisted open the largest doll. Inside was a slightly smaller doll and a folded note. She read aloud:

“What did the Russian nesting doll say to her psychiatrist?“

The class leaned forward.

“I don’t know, Professor, what did she say?” called out a student from the back.

Evelyn opened the second doll, revealing another note: “I’m feeling a little empty inside.“

Amid groans and laughter, she continued, “Let’s see what else we have here.”

The third doll contained another note: “Why did the physicist keep a matryoshka doll on his desk?“

She opened the fourth doll: “To remind him that for every problem, there’s a smaller, harder problem inside.“

The students chuckled, watching as she reached for the fifth doll.

This one read: “A student walked into my office yesterday carrying a ladder.“

The sixth doll: “I asked what they were doing, and they said they were going to take my class to reach a higher level.“

By now, the class was in stitches. Evelyn’s deadpan delivery made each punchline land perfectly.

The seventh doll contained: “What’s a recursive joke?“

And the eighth: “See inside for the punchline.“

When she opened the ninth doll, it was empty. Evelyn looked confused.

“That’s strange,” she said, peering inside. “There’s nothing here.”

A student in the front row raised her hand. “Professor, isn’t that the punchline to the recursive joke? You have to keep looking inside for an answer that isn’t there?”

“Ah!” Evelyn exclaimed. “Very good, Ms. Chen! Or at least, that’s what I would say if this were actually the prank.”

She smiled mysteriously and pressed a hidden button at the bottom of the smallest doll. The classroom lights suddenly dimmed, and a projector activated, displaying on the wall: “YOUR MIDTERM EXAM BEGINS NOW.”

Panic swept across the room until the message changed to: “APRIL FOOL’S! CLASS DISMISSED – ENJOY YOUR SPRING BREAK!”

Relief and laughter filled the room as students gathered their things. As they filed out, Evelyn handed each student a tiny matryoshka—each containing a chocolate and a note reading, “Like any good story, the best jokes work on multiple levels.”

One student paused at the door. “Professor, was this whole elaborate setup just so you could make that pun?”

“Of course not,” Evelyn replied with a twinkle in her eye. “That would be completely… dolled up.”

As the groans echoed down the hallway, Professor Winters smiled to herself. Next year would have to be even better.

~The End~